


The Last Barman Poet

by nativemossy



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers - Ambiguous Fandom
Genre: Bathroom Sex, Blow Jobs, Drunk Sex, Explicit Sexual Content, Frottage, Hand Jobs, M/M, Neck Kissing, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Praise Kink, Semi-Public Sex, Strangers to Lovers, Vacation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-05
Updated: 2019-08-05
Packaged: 2020-07-31 09:17:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,845
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20112754
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nativemossy/pseuds/nativemossy
Summary: Tony wasn't expecting anything more than dealing with a tequila-drunk Clint and a slightly wrinkled suit on this trip to Mexico. He got plenty more than he bargained for when he catches the eye of a handsome vacationer at the swim-up bar. Tipsy shenanigans ensue.





	The Last Barman Poet

**Author's Note:**

> fill for Stony Bingo space O3 - Free Space
> 
> big shout out to my betas, but especially Maeve who is always ready to help with a fic :)

“For a guy with as much money as you have you don’t really vacation well, huh?”

Tony huffed, wiggling a little on his pool chair. “Just because I’m stressed about this going right doesn’t mean that I’m not enjoying myself.” Which was absolutely true. He was enjoying his stay at the resort very much, he just wanted the wedding to go as planned. Even though he wasn’t the wedding planner, or the best man, or anywhere remotely involved with anything other than celebrating.

Ok, maybe he was a bit stressed. That didn’t mean that he didn’t know how to relax; that was just baseless slander.

“You’ve sure got a death grip on that glass there, bud - you sure you’re not stressed?” Clint looked over from his perch on his chair, stretched out beneath the sun in a pair of garishly purple trunks and sunglasses. He looked far too relaxed for someone who was about to be married the next day, in Tony’s opinion. 

“I’m doing just fine. I am wondering if you want to get married at all, considering you don’t really seem to be fazed by any of this.”

At this Clint grinned, taking a sip of his drink before replying, “How could I be? I’m marrying the best guy in the world, I’m chilling at a pool in Mexico, and I’ve had a couple shots of tequila. There’s literally nothing that could faze me right now.” He lifted his empty shot glass as if to prove his point, grinning when a staff member grabbed it on their way by.

“You need to relax, Tony,” Clint said, resting a hand on his shoulder, “Hop in that magnificent pool, go to the swim-up bar, and have yourself a drink. Chill out a bit.” He huffed when Tony just looked askance in response, rolling his eyes and shoving him slightly. “Just go. Get a little drunk in honor of the last day of my bachelorhood.”

Tony heard Bucky grunt from the next chair over. Clint let out a yelp, and then turned around. Tony heard more than saw the ensuing shoving match, and cleared out before it inevitably evolved into a makeout session that was just as interesting as it was disgusting on multiple levels. 

Tony shuffled his way to the steps, stepping into the lukewarm water with a sigh. He had been skeptical about this destination wedding business - not that he couldn’t afford it - but even he could leave some of that behind in the face of a sunny day spent lounging on the poolside with a drink in his hand.

No, he certainly wasn’t the best man, he mused as he waded up to the bar. That title belonged to Natasha, who had ruthlessly and efficiently wrangled Clint and Bucky’s ragtag group of weirdos onto the same resort for a week. That wasn’t even mentioning arranging room reservations, finding and hiring a minister, and getting Bucky and Clint fitted for suits.

No, the only thing Tony had to do was show up and look pretty. Those were Natasha’s words, not his, though he was doing his level best to live up to them.

“Sir, do you want anything?” A passing bartender asked, already shoveling ice into a glass for a different patron. 

Tony thought about it for a minute, then shrugged to himself. What the hell. “I’ll have a tequila shot and a Crown and water, gracias.” The bartender flashed him a grin and turned around, grabbing a bottle and moving a ways down the bar. Tony let his eyes wander down the bar, silently scanning the bar for anything that may catch his eye. 

He did a double take about halfway through, feeling his interest pique when he saw a massive blonde with a tiny, colorful drink in front of him. He indulged himself in looking his fill for a while, pausing only to tip the bartender when he returned with his drinks. 

The tall stranger was a fascinating study in contradictions, that was absolutely certain. He towered over the other patrons, even halfway seated on a submerged barstool, but he held himself like a much smaller man. Tony could hear the deep base of his voice from across the bar, but as far as volume went he was far more quiet than the tipsy vacationers that surrounded him.

His giant hands dwarfed the plastic cup in them, and when he gently moved the tiny umbrella to take a drink Tony felt his face heat. If asked, he was going to blame the liquor.

His face looked like it had been chisled out of fucking marble, and his jawline was twice as sharp. If Tony allowed his eyes to dip just a bit lower - which he did - he could see a set of abs that would have put Greek statues to shame. Tony wanted to explore them thoroughly. With his tongue.

Now there was an idea, he mused, taking a sip of his drink with a satisfied hum. He hadn’t been in a relationship for years, and hadn’t really fooled around for even longer. Sure, sometimes he was tempted when a pretty face crossed his eye, but he’d learned pretty early on that pleasure and business didn’t mix well, and the payoff was never worth the fallout.

But that was the past. This was the present, and he was on vacation. He didn’t have to close a business deal with him the next afternoon. The most he had to do tomorrow was get dressed and clap politely.

Tony noticed the blond looking in his direction, and made a point of catching his eye. It was really unfair how such a stern face could make such a lovely smile. He took his shot, making eye contact the whole time. It slid down his throat with a pleasant burn, and he saw the man swallow hard. It was hard to swallow down his own predatory smile, but he settled for a raunchy grin, getting a small chuckle and a blush in response.

Tony figured that’d be the end of it - he had enjoyed some harmless flirting but wasn’t expecting much else. He was shocked silent when after a few moments he felt a presence at his shoulder, and craned his neck up (and up, and up) to see the blond beefcake standing there, his fine hair wreathed in a halo of bright summer sunlight. He had that same dorky grin on his face, and Tony would have said it wasn’t suited for his face if it hadn’t been so damn charming.

His hair was combed into a neat arrangement on top of his head. Tony longed to mess it up, just a little.

“So, are you enjoying your vacation?” Oh fuck. Yeah, Tony could listen to this guy talk all day long for the rest of his life and probably never get tired of the sound. His voice was deep, deep enough where Tony could almost feel it in his own chest, but butter smooth. Tony took a sip of his drink to compose himself, focusing on looking at least a little cool.

“Yeah,” He began, trying to sound airy and casual, “I’m actually here for a friend’s wedding, so I’ve got about six days of vacation and one day of actually doing something.” 

The man chuckled at his admittedly dry attempt at a reply, looking down at Tony with a smile that crinkled the corners of his eyes. “It’s the same for me, actually. My best friend is getting married, but all I was told to do is show up.” He rubbed the back of his neck, looking nothing if not painfully endearing. “I feel like I should be doing more, but they’ve seem to got it all covered.”

Now, Tony really didn’t care all that much about the man’s friends, or the other marriage that was apparently happening at the resort that week. What Tony really cared about, at that point, was what the fine gentleman’s name was, and if he was willing to follow Tony into the cramped pool bathroom to play a little beat the clock with him.

Tony sipped at his drink as they chatted, feeling himself become easy and loose as the alcohol did it’s job. Steve, as he turned out to be, was also loosening up. After another colorful drink he slung his arm over Tony’s shoulder, leaving goosebumps to rise over his arms at the wonderfully warm pressure. 

It had been, by Tony’s incredibly tipsy estimate, about an hour filled with small talk and chit chat, with some minimal flirting thrown in for measure. Had it been with anybody else he would have called it quits a while ago, but Steve was just easy to talk to. He was in the middle of rambling his way through a story about work when Steve leaned in, making Tony shiver when his warm breath puffed against the skin behind his ear.

“How about you and I go find someplace private for a while?” He asked, and Tony had to bite back a moan at the molten heat in his voice. 

It was all he could to do nod furiously in response, pushing away from the bar and almost tipping himself into the water. Steve steadied him with gentle hands, leading him firmly out of the water and towards the tiny restroom behind the bar.

They stumbled through the door, leaving him giggling in a way that Tony would absolutely feel embarrassed about when he was sober. Steve locked the door behind them, then turned Tony right around into it, slipping a broad hand into his hair and swallowing Tony’s breathy moans when he grasped at it gently.

They made out like teenagers against the door for a few long moments, leaving Tony to enjoy the wet sounds echoing around the tiny stall. Tony parted his lips slightly, dragging the tip of his tongue along Steve’s bottom lip. Steve stuttered out a moan, pressing Tony a little more firmly into the door while he opened his mouth to Tony’s tongue.

Tony contented himself with trading sloppy kisses for a while, just enjoying the buzz of alcohol and a warm body against his, but apparently Steve wasn’t as happy to slow down. In the space between one kiss and the next he slotted a thigh between Tony’s legs, pressing right up against his cock and _ rubbing _. 

Tony gasped out a moan and ripped his head away, panting for breath as he ground down helplessly. Steve let out a low groan, pressing lips and teeth to Tony’s neck in a move that made his knees weaken just slightly. Steve must have felt it because he hefted Tony up just a little, bracing his feet and suspending him in an effortless move that turned Tony’s knees to jelly.

“D-Don’t leave any marks,” Tony gasped out, gasping a hoarse moan when Steve gave an inquisitive noise against his neck. “I’ve gotta wear a suit tomorrow, or I’d absolutely let you go wild.” 

The excuse wasn’t really needed, considering that Steve had already pecked his way up to Tony’s ear, but he hummed in response, sending a hot trail of desire down Tony’s spine. He felt teeth nibbling lightly at his ear and uttered a soft groan, letting his head fall back on the door.

He wasn’t wearing a shirt, so when Steve’s hand wandered down from his shoulder (and wasn’t that just mind-meltingly hot - he only needed one hand to hold Tony up) and across his chest, grazing over his nipple and sending hot tingles of arousal through his body. 

Steve must have felt something from that because Tony could feel him grin against his hair, and brought his hand back around Tony’s chest. This time the pressure was much more firm, he’d thumb over it a few times and then pinch at it lightly, firm enough to keep him interested but too slow to really speed anything up. The hot slide of his thigh between Tony’s legs offered a delicious counterpoint, and Tony found himself grasping weakly at Steve’s arms just to have something to hold on to. 

Steve seemed to content himself with turning Tony’s brain to mush for several long moments, but just as Tony was expecting to enjoy a frottage orgasm right there against the wall Steve shifted his hand down, gliding it firmly over Tony’s stomach to the waistband of his trunks. “May I?” He murmured into Tony’s ear, picking lightly at the elastic.

“Please,” He moaned, doing his best to hold in a cheer of excitement when a large, warm hand slid into his shorts. Steve grasped him firmly, just on this side of too hard. His hand was dry, but not unpleasantly so as he jacked him slowly, thumbing lightly over the head and squeezing at the base. The alcohol apparently wasn’t rushing Steve at all, and Tony wasn’t about to complain. 

Tony certainly wasn’t complaining when Steve did something magical with his wrist that turned his half-drunk brain into nothing but fireworks and static, and his toes curled so hard that his legs nearly cramped. He locked his ankles behind Steve’s back, holding on for dear life as he apparently set out to melt him into a puddle of goo. Tony sucked a breath in on a moan, sliding one of his hands into Steve’s fine hair and grasping clumsily. 

“Close-” He choked out, jerking a little when all Steve did was pick up the pace. Before Tony knew it he was cumming into Steve’s hand, gasping out his name and a tangled string of explicatives. 

His head fell back onto the door, and his chest rose in uneven pants as he met Steve’s eyes. They shone with an absolutely wicked gleam as Steve carefully brought his hand up to his mouth, licking it clean in precise little laps. Without ever breaking eye contact.

Tony was all at once too tipsy and not drunk enough for this.

He groaned throatily at the display, using the hand in Steve’s hair to haul him closer for more kisses. Tony could taste himself on Steve, which was probably the hottest thing he had ever experienced in the history of ever. They stood tangled like that for a minute until Tony stopped thinking with his dick long enough to feel Steve’s up against his thigh.

Tony felt his mouth water as he started squirming a bit, both silently asking to be let down and desperately trying to feel more of his hot length against him. Steve grunted, but got the hint and set him down. He let out a murmur of dazed surprise when Tony slid straight to his knees, sliding the waistband of his trunks down as gently as he could. His cock sprung free, fully erect and curved slightly to the left. Tony followed the line of it with his eyes, licking his lips in bare anticipation.

Tony looked up at Steve from under his lashes, coyly grinning when Steve gave a helpless little moan in reply. He licked his lips again, just for show, then opened his mouth over Steve’s cockhead, giving the tip a filthy kiss. 

Tony heard Steve groan again and looked up, feeling everything in him melt at the heated look Steve was giving him. He let out a little moan of his own, delighting in the slick slide of Steve’s cock when he gave a tiny thrust from the vibrations. 

Tony set to work, bobbing his head back and forth along Steve’s cock. It really was a thing of beauty - long and hard and a perfect weight in his throat. At some point Tony looked up when Steve’s hand slid into his hair to see Steve propped up with one hand against the door. Tony stiffened for a brief moment, almost expecting the firm hand at the back of his head to guide his pace. Instead, all Steve did was pet gently at his curls, scratching lightly at his scalp and murmuring praise while Tony started again.

For such a big guy Steve was awful quiet, though as to how much of that was intentional Tony wasn’t sure. He went heavy on the praise - something that always made Tony’s spine feel like a livewire - and only paused when he came. He tried, bless his heart, to pull out before, but Tony just grabbed his hips and held him there, brought his hand up to press his thumb to his perineum and rolled against it. That's all it took to have Steve spilling into his mouth, going silent when he bit into the meat of his hand to keep quiet.

The tiny bathroom was quiet for a long moment before Steve groaned, yanking Tony up into a kiss that was as passionate as it was messy. Neither of them were at their most coordinated, between the drinks and an orgasm each, but what he lacked in finesse he made up for in his determination to suck Tony’s brain out through his mouth. After a few minutes Tony was almost convinced he had succeeded.

They separated in fits and starts, with several attempts at straightening out their hair ruined when Tony pulled Steve into another kiss, or Steve took a fistful of hair to leave open-mouthed kisses on Tony’s neck. Eventually they got themselves together, but were definitely fooling no-one with the loose grins plastered on their faces.

Tony forwent a goodbye, leaving Steve with only a stern “Stop looking like you just got laid,” before moseying his way down the hallways towards his room. The deep baritone laugh that followed him kept him warm until he crawled into bed, feeling satisfied in the most bone-deep way. 

He was asleep before his head even hit the pillow.

* * *

Tony woke up gradually, only really being awake when he fully opened his eyes. He had a vague, warm awareness of his limbs, but everything seemed so very unimportant when put against the fact that he was probably the most comfortable he had been in a while.

He had slept all through the night, like a fucking baby, and woken up feeling sleepy and good and like he could fall back asleep and do it all again. He knew he shouldn’t do that, somewhere in the back of his mind, but that didn’t stop him from being tempted.

He took a moment to focus and piece together where he was and what happened, and when he did he groaned, rolling over and jamming the pillow over his head.

He really did have tipsy pool-bathroom sex with a stranger last night. And the bitch of it all was that he enjoyed himself. A lot. To the point where thinking about it for too long was enough to get him going again and he really didn’t have time for that, considering that he had a pre-wedding brunch to make before jamming himself into the monkey suit for the ceremony.

He picked his head up enough to check the time on his phone, feeling his stomach sink when he saw the time. He had 20 minutes to make it to the ceremony, 25 if they got it started a little late.

He scrambled out of the bed, feeling precious seconds slip by when he had to pause to untangle himself from the bedsheets. He stumbled through his morning routine, making sure to rinse his mouth with mouthwash twice to get rid of the foul combination of “had drinks last night” breath and “sucked a dick and swallowed” breath. 

He felt heat rising to his cheeks as he thought about Steve’s huge hands in his hair, muttering praise that Tony couldn’t even fucking remember but fuck had it been hot.

Ok, focus, he had a wedding to get to.

With five minutes to go he dashed out the door, only pausing to grab his room key on the way out. He did the fastest fast-walk he could stand while also straightening the cuffs of his jacket and brushing the lint off his pants.

Clint shot him the dirtiest look as he slid into his seat, panting slightly but not entirely late. Tony did his best to relay his remorse and an “I’ll tell you about it later” all in one glance. It must have worked to some degree because Clint just raised an eyebrow, turning to Bucky and the minister with a doofy grin pasted on his face.

Tony had every intention of sitting and enjoying all the emotions flying around, but his eyes loved to wander. He listened vaguely to Clint’s personal vows to Bucky as eyes landed on an incredibly familiar blond, standing right next to Bucky. He looked absolutely edible in a suit, with the navy blue jacket making his already broad shoulders look massive. However, he had a decidedly unsexy deer-in-the-headlights expression on his face. Tony wasn’t so sure that his face looked any different.

Once they both got over their shock, and the wedded couple shared a kiss that was a little too heavy for their audience, there was a small “reception,” which was really just everyone who had been able to make it mingling together for cake and cocktails.

Tony was hiding next to the cake table when he felt a presence by his side, a glass of champagne appearing in his line of sight not long after. He turned and looked up (and up, and up, and up) to see Steve, looking sheepish and small in all his finery. Tony felt his stomach drop as musings on contradictions filled his head once again.

“Come here often?” Steve asked hopefully, shaking the glass as if Tony had somehow missed it. Tony snorted a little, what a dork. He was lucky he was cute.

When Tony managed nothing more than staring dazedly for a long beat Steve began to lower his arm, his smile dimming into something more polite and apologetic.

“I don’t have sex with strangers.” Tony blurted out, wishing desperately he could reach out and grab those words once they had escaped from his mouth.

Steve paused, looking puzzled, then morose. “Ah,” He began, and Tony knew he needed to stop him right there before this got more out of hand.

“And I-” he took a breath, wanting this to come out right, for once, “I don’t want to set a precedent for myself, for, you know,” Steve quirked an eyebrow, looking patiently confused. Ok, so he didn’t know. “I don’t want to start having sex with strangers, at all.”

Steve visibly dissected that statement for a moment, looking disheartened, then maybe a bit hopeful. Tony was feeling hopeful too - if Steve could understand his shitty attempt at a discussion of relationships and emotions this relationship was already light years ahead of the last couple long-term partners he had. 

“Tony,” Steve began, offering the champagne out again, “Would you like to go out sometime? With me?” He turned an absolutely gorgeous shade of pink at the fumble and Tony held back a grin, reaching out with shaking fingers to take the stem.

“I’d love to.”

**Author's Note:**

> yes, despite neither Tony nor Steve being a bartender I still used the title of the poem from Cocktail bc i liked it and it fit
> 
> drafted when I was on my own mexican resort vacation, and unlike Tony, I got pretty drunk at the swim-up bar and then promptly went back to my room to sleep it off.
> 
> chat with me on [tumblr](https://nativemossy.tumblr.com/), [pillowfort](https://www.pillowfort.social/nativemossy), or [dreamwidth](https://nativemossy.dreamwidth.org/)


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